Memorial website in the memory of your loved one

Darling Angel,
If only once more I could hold you this way no gravity would ever make me let you go. When the stars shine in heaven never will your memory fade. When time passes and the seasons change never will you be far from thought. Our souls are forever intertwined destine for eternity and protected by Angelic time. When you sit at the Christmas table with Jesus this day. Remember me and tell him I love him and love you with a infinite and unyielding selfishness that will never change. Your exit from my life was wrong and I never did anything to deserve the hell I've lived without you here. God knows you were the only true happiness I've ever experienced. After you putting one foot in front of the other makes a pain that will never again go away. Please somehow touch me, encourage me and help me to know your never truly that far from me. Thank you for your love, joy and happiness which made my life complete. Loving hugs Mommy

12/25/2012


Wow, my sweet baby girl. By now college would have been behind you and life would be bubbling over with joy and family.

I miss you every day no doubt that will never end till we meet again. I know heaven must be a beautiful place and when I look up you’re the first thought in my mind. Wish Christmas could have brought some of those awesome hugs you could give me.

My heart cries out for you and my soul yearns for your touch. Thank you for all the joy you brought to my life but especially for the unconditional love.

Merry Christmas baby love you bunches. Bless me with your special Heaven Hugs I pray Love Mommy : )

My sweet girl Thanksgiving was always one of your favorite days. Over five years ago since I seen your precious face. Oh I have the pictures and the memories but nothing compares to hearing your laugh, seeing first hand your smile and having the awesome hug. Darling let your spirit of light shine through this day for all of us whom miss you. Never forget just how thankful I am to have had you if even for a moment. Look forward to one day being reunited in your presence. I love you and miss you dearly loving hugs and kisses. Mommy

05/13/2011

Thank you for my Mother's Day my darling Angel. For the entire Mother's Days you gave me along the way. This one was heaven blessed with the signs and special gifts sent direct from heaven. Just like you my precious child to get through any boundaries to let me know of your love. Life here is not the same without you but you keep reminding me that love prevails and overcomes the pain. Hugs and kisses straight to heaven for you from my heart.

11/25/10

HAPPY THANKSGIVING, MY DARLING ANGEL.  MY HEART IS SAD WITHOUT YOU.  I'M THANKFUL FOR EVERY PRECIOUS MOMENT YOU GAVE ME.  THANK YOU FOR LEAVING ME A BUMPER FOR MY HEART FULL OF BEAUTIFUL MEMORIES.  CATCH MY BUTTERFLY KISSES AS I BLOW THEM UP TO HEAVEN!

08/08/10

Angel had a smile that would light up any heart. An unconditional love that transcends throughout time and eternity. Joy that tops any experience a person could know. A laugh that would make the sourest soul give way to a chuckle. She made me sing like a bird, happy to be alive, feel as if life really mattered, and oh she made me smile. Today is four years since her departure to heaven. She would have been 19 years old today in college and living her life to the fullest. Oh I miss her so heaven is full of her joy no doubt.   I love you Angel hope you catch that kiss I blow and send one back.  Hugs, Mommy  

12/19/09

I can imagine the Christmas times while you were here. The Santa Hat you looked so cute in the laughter, smiles and excitement that always filled the air. It’s not the same without you here only you could make my heart laugh and sing. Till heaven opens up and lets me in I’ll miss you more than the sky would miss the sunshine. Sweetheart blow me down some kisses as I safely tuck inside my heart your sweet and precious memories. Merry Christmas my Angel, Love Mommy.

03/19/08
It's mommy again sweetie leaving you a message hoping from heaven you might see. I miss you and love you. Wish you could be cuddled up close in my arms tonight. Yet another night comes and goes and I'm still having to miss you from afar.  I prayed once gain Heavenly Father gives you a big hug on my behalf. Your my Angel darling and will always be.

02/05/09
Sweet girl of mine mommy misses you so much. Valentines is coming again without you.  Although your memory is still tucked safely inside my heart. Each day I remember all the unconditional love only you could share. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for forever being mine. I Love You with all my heart. Stay close in sprit my sweet child one day we will walk hand and hand
in through heaven's gate. Love Mommy!

11/26/08
Our Thanksgiving tradition was for everyone at the table to tell what they were most thankful for. You my sweetheart were always thankful for your family and never failed to tell us. I love you and am most thankful you came to be with me more than words can say. I miss you sweetie no matter how many day’s pass sense you left. I never ever quit missing you but most certainly I’ll never forget to be thankful for you. Loving hugs my darling.  Give Grandpa & Papaw a special hug for mommy. Love you bunches!
08/02/08
When I laugh I think of you how beautiful it was to see you smile, How happy it made you to see joy on my face.  When times seemed tough you always assured me they would get better. There is no one here now sweetheart to dry my tears, pray with me my prayers smile and laugh to bring me joy.  I miss you so much God knows each morning why I pray that you feel my hug and kiss.  Why is all that's left to ask anymore even though were not supposed to ask that and my memories of you are all that's left.  Sweetheart life has always been tough for me but when you came into my world it got easier.  My purpose started the moment I looked into your eyes the first time.  Now my purpose it unknown it makes me feel so lost to be without you. Your the only selfish prayer I ever asked for myself.  God knows I'll nevere regret my prayer to experience the unconditional love you brought to myself.  Sweetie it's hard to say they will get better without you here cheering me on.  Each day I search for purpose, each day I search for signs of you of course your sure to show me now and then.  Never a day goes by even tough it's been almost two years now never a day goes by without me missing you.  Loving hugs Mommy
 
06/27/08
Darling Angel I've tried to keep back the tears but some day's are harder than others.  The little things I need to celebrate with you, make me long for you that much more.  I looked up at the stars tonight as if somehow you could see me gazing and thinking of our star gaze events of the past.  Mommy loves you & misses you so much.  Wish your little hand could be holding mine right now and you were snuggled right up next to me.  Heaven I'm sure is busy and exciting but sweet girl keep helping Mommy make it through these long lonely day's without you.  Hope you feel my heart hugs up there! 
 
05/24/08
SWEET GIRL I KNOW YOUR WATCHING OVER ME FROM HEAVEN. 
MY LIFE IS STILL TOUGH WITHOUT YOU HERE.  THIS YEAR IS THE
ONE IN WHICH YOU WOULD HAVE BEEN BECOMING A SENIOR AND PREPARING FOR COLLEGE.  THOUGHTS CROSS MY MIND WITH ALL THOSE THINGS NEVER TO COME.  SOME TIMES I ASK WHY, SOME TIMES I JUST CRY YET EACH DAY YOUR ON MY MIND.  I THINK OF ALL THE TIMES WE HAD AND CHERRISH EACH MOMENT IN MEMORY.  MISSING YOU I'VE COME TO KNOW WILL CONTINUE EACH DAY I WAKE.  YOU WERE AND ALWAYS BE MOMMY'S ANGEL.  PLEASE GIVE JESUS A HUG TELL HIM HOW MUCH MOMMY LOVES HIM.  SEND ME THOSE ANGEL KISSES AND CATCH THE ONES I SEND BACK.  THANKS FOR THE LITTLE GIFTS, SIGNS AND LOVE I KNOW YOU SEND MY WAY.  ALWAYS REMEMBER YOUR MY ANGEL, IF YOU CAN SEND ME SWEET GUIDEDANCE TO HELP ME CONTINUE DOWN THIS PATH
TIL WE MEET AGAIN!

Angel one day I was going to share your life’s story and how you came to be but never got that chance. I wanted a child more than anything in this world for years I prayed for you. The doctors said no children in my future but I didn’t give up or lose faith I continued to pray. Especially during the earliest part of your existence from within the womb somehow I was affected with morning sickness this prompted me to pray even more. The reason why is because I knew no way was it possible I was pregnant in the physical sense yet heavenly father had a plan. You were brought into the world through a different woman whom told me later she had always had morning sickness till you. This woman did not wish to have another child and even confessed she tried to abort you while you were early in the womb. I was in a different State when heavenly father prompted me to return to my previous State and home. There was a catch to this prompting though I did not want to return to my previous home. I could not ignore my heavenly father, obey is what I had to do but in doing so I asked for you once more. Shortly after obeying heavenly father and returning to my previous home. My sister came to tell me of a woman the one who carried you but she was not certain if I was interested. Later my sister brought this woman into our home.  Immediately there was no explaining it but she knew I was your Mother. The same happened to me I knew she was the one whom held my most cherished gift you. I took her to the doctor visits and did not miss a moment in anxious anticipation of the moment you would come. I even knew the day and the moment you would come into the world my sweet precious child. The happiest day of my life was when I first looked into your eyes it was as if I had looked into the soul of heaven. The moment our eyes met their was no description that comes close the world stopped and peace joy and love filed every inch of space in the room. Your eyes held keys that can never be replaced unconditional love was what you brought into my life. Holding you in my arms my life was complete nothing could ever come close to expression of contentment holding you brought to my world. As I watched you grow you were intelligent, walked, talked and latched onto every moment of life with an indescribable energy and enthusiasm. Other attributes arose along the way you were inquisitive, loyal, loving and kind. I watched you on numerous occasions as you dance through my world with so much joy and ambition to live for the moment. Reminding me continuously to smell the flowers as you go, barney the dinosaur songs were sung regularly. We shared laughter, joy, fun, sunshine, rainbows, stars and lent the world such a great gift with your incredible smile. You touched others hearts & souls making a difference everywhere you went. You had an incredible sense of humor bringing laughter everywhere. There were toys consisting of barney, baby bop, baby dolls, jacks, monopoly, the list goes on and on. Our journey had mostly laughter although we did have some tears. It was a tough world for both of us at times the man calling himself dad made days harder than they had to be. I wish so many times sweet girl I would have gathered you up and just stowed away with you far far away. I remember so much holding you in my arms protecting you from all sorts of possible harms. You have no ideal my sweet girl just how much you meant to me for this I’m sorry I never truly let you know. I needed you darling with every ounce of my soul you thought me so much without you I’m lost. I just don’t know how to go on sweetheart my heart is broken and this time I don’t think it can be fixed. I try so hard to go forward but again without you I’m so lost while you were here I had purpose. You made me so happy through you I lived each day, sure we had moments where we did not see eye to eye. But my precious you have no ideal how I lived each breath through you how you gave me energy I never knew. How I could look in your eyes and see far into your soul our souls are forever connected in ways unexplainable. I wanted to be beside you one day when you heard your own babies cry, as you went through the college years, watch you walk down the isle and see all the things for you I never had. Darling I wanted to be your mommy I needed to be your mommy how do I go forward without you here. I don’t understand why this had to happen I’m lost in so many ways my life can never move forward as happy as before you left me. I know you thought somehow you were not important in my world now you’ll never know just how much I depended on you. I wish so many things could have come to be.



You loved everyone in your path, shared everything you had, giving each day completely from the heart. Never did you meet a stranger, Felt it was your duty and worried if someone was ill, sad or needed of something you had. So funny you could be especially for family and friends, I’ve so much to share for you were so busy with life an expert spelling bee champ, wonderful swimmer, award winning merit list holder, expert baby sitter, gymnast, signer, flute player in the band. You were going to be a pediatrician, have beautiful children of your own one girl and one boy. You were such a beautiful gift teaching me and others along your way. You were known for fighting for the underdog, and had such an exceptional spirit and love of all living things. You loved sweet movies, music, talking on the phone with friends, constantly on the go. Apple Jacks for breakfast, pickles, ice cream, candy, cheeses’ food the list goes on and on. You had courage, compassion and love more than some people will ever know.

As the years went by and I watched you grow I remember so many things your driving the four wheeler and flipping it. Getting up seeing my face full of fear and running your way you said I’m okay mom I was so scared I said no more four wheeler for you. Angel do you know somehow how much you meant to me how very much I love you? Please somehow let me know, life is so hard with you gone I just want to hold you once more that’s all I ask God please let me hold you close just once more. I remember holding you close in my arms looking into your eyes sharing a connection only the two of us could know. A friend of yours told me of days when you and her would roll down the hill to see who could make it to the bottom first. How you lived so much in such a short time it’s as if somehow you always knew your days were short. I could not count the cards and notes you wrote the pictures you drew for me how much you loved me. When you hugged me my darling nothing of this world could ever matter I wanted so much to repay your sweet love. Sometimes I would over hear you talking for hours on the phone and just giggle to myself as if I were living as a child through you. So many times it crossed my mind how I would remind you of some of those day’s. I know you would not want me to cry no matter how hard it is for me not to I’ll try not to anymore. It’s been almost two years now since you left my side to return to heaven and seems it will always be hard. If tomorrow things were different and God said I had a choice to make, suffer in pain or to never know you.  There is not doubt what the answer would be. No matter how much pain I’ve endured or how much may come because I can no longer hold you in my arms. I would not trade one precious moment with you in my life I assure you not one.


Thank you for choosing me as your mommy!





12/25/2007

I’ve truly walked hand n hand with an Angel!

My darling on this Christmas eve as the moon shines down a wonderfully bright beam. I think of our Christmas past and the realization strikes me once again that I’ve truly walked hand n hand with an Angel. You really were and always will be my Angel no one could ever take your place. My heart yearns each day for the special moments you brought that made life feel so complete. Seeing your excitement and anticipation from the Christmas times shared in the past. It brought my heart such a real and wonderful joy never again will I fell the same. Tonight I hold anticipation of sharing in hopes you can see the special little Christmas gift of love for you. I will look upward and smile for you so be watchfully waiting my sweet precious child. Mommy will be sending you a smile, hug and kiss to heaven. Bless me with a favor capture the kiss and blow one back as you’ve done so many times before. For this night tis all I can do is make my Christmas wish, I Love You forever my Christmas and forever Angel. 
Love Mommy



12/01/2007

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FROM YOUR MOMMY!
Oh Sweet child of mine today is a bit tough!  Who would have ever thought you would be spending your 17th Birthday in heaven.  Today I pray heavenly father will give you a grand present 
there in heaven.  Thank you for loving me and leaving me with such wonderful memories.  
I miss holding your hand, hearing your laugh, seeing your smile but most of all I miss that beautiful spirit of love you brought into my life.
I LOVE YOU, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TODAY 
I'LL  SING TO YOU IN HOPES YOU CAN 
HEAR ME.   

10/27/2007

My dear sweet child I want to share with you the first moments in time with you. Hearing your voice for the first time brought joy to my soul, looking into your eyes it was as if I had known you forever, holding you as tiny as you were in my arms my life could never and will never be so complete. Seeing your first smile stopped my heart in-between beats. I pray the legacy you left within those whom you loved my dear sweet child lives on to be shared with the world. You came to see me here on this side and one day it will be my turn to come see you in heaven. Till that day when I hear the signing of a bird or water running through a creek. Feel you touching my hair look and realize your not there, close my eyes and feel you close by or take a breath to smell your sweet scent. I’ll forever be thinking of you yearning to see your sweet face, hear your sweet voice waiting for you to welcome me to the other side.
 
I Love You and miss you my dear sweet Angel.

08/08/07
I love you my Angel I left you a note to tell you so when starting my day.
My loving Angel God knows how hard the day was for me holding in the tears. Each moment throughout the year has been spent thinking of all the things we did together. Different times I spent reflecting back to what ever moment it was a year before when you were with me. Sleepless nights, tears, prayers heavenly father would hug and kiss you for me the list goes on and on. Although somehow I know you knew what was going on each moment sometimes feeling you right beside me. When sadness came a song would come on the radio, one of your friends would call, you somehow continued sending the signs that got me through. I’m sure you have been begging heavenly father daily to allow you to present signs to let me know you were with me. My heart gets heavy missing you so but the day was not as hard as expected it to be.  Your friends stuck right by my side sharing prayers, memories, tears and love for you each step of the way.  I know you were proud as was I today of them. I know more than ever now why you called them friend.  Now my prayer is that I always get the signs that somehow we are able to make a difference for others and help spare them pain we’ve had to endure. That each day I spend here without you makes a difference that will reflect the love you shared with others.  Someone very famous once told me you had a devine destiny and would yourself one day be famous.  Your always famous to me and were my every breath worth taking Angel I know somehow you know this.  I Love You yesterday, today, tommorow and for ever can't wait til one day we are reunited. Love Mommy 



08/06/07

As for the year it's been hard for me but my beautiful Angel has shown me signs along the way.  Of course the tears come for I miss you my sweet Angel can't help that.  You always had a way to make me laugh when I was sad.  Even today you can bring a smile to my face searching through the memories.  God granted you wings now it seems you fly all over bringing those you love special blessings.  My precious Angel you thanked me but it's myself whom feels the need to thank you for loving me unconditionally.    

07/26/07
My precious little girl thank you for showing me the rainbow.  Your smiling face and excitement dragging me by the hand out to see the last one we seen together is what came to mind.  It's still hard without you no matter how much I work toward healing don't feel it will ever come.  One day though will bring that joy again when I see your most precious loving face comming to greet me the day I get to come up to heaven.  
I Love You & miss you look forward to the day we can be together once more.   Love Mommy.

04/18/07
This heart is for you my sweet girl each day your with me in thought and spirt.  Not a day goes by without you included in it for me and never will there be one.  Wish I could get that hug, that kiss but more than anything that smile.  Spring is here I planted sunflowers am looking for that rainbow sweetie.  Love Mom 



12/30/06
My sweet and precious baby girl coming into the new year I feel somehow I’m leaving you behind in 2006. Silly I know but it’s like all the little things leading up to now the last bill of groceries we purchased at the store together. How sad I was as those perishables disappeared knowing I could not keep them but knowing your little hands were involved. I remember the Happy New Year Message we shared between us last year and how funny you were. My heart is in mourning for your sweet gentle touch your hand holding mine the love no one else could give. Somehow from heaven can you send me a sign let me know the new year your spirit will be with me. Happy New Year my sweet and precious Angel please continue to join me in my New Years Prayer and guide me with your light. 
I Love You!


12/25/06
Merry Christmas my baby girl thanks for sharing each day you did with me.
Today I will spend thinking of you signing Happy Birthday in person to Jesus. You will always dwell inside my heart, thoughts and prayers. Making it through this Christmas will be tough without you,. I did not add presents under the tree this year in fear of breaking down. But instead I am thinking of our Christmas’s past and all the excitement and joy you brought to my world. Mommy loves you baby girl, always your close to me in spirit.


This memorial site was created on behalf of my daughter Misty ANGEL Trantham whom was born on December 1st 1990 and left this world all to soon on August 8th 2006. Angel was the most important part of my life from the moment she was born her sweet spirit encompassed my every move. She will be forever etched in my memory and dwell within my heart, thoughts and prayers. She was only 15 years old but was truly the joy of my life and those whom she touched. She would do anything for anyone she was the most generous person I know.  She loved myself, family and friends like no one else could. Angel walked early, spoke early, was very intelligent, energetic, full of joy and had a zest for life that was never ending. She was beautiful from the outside in her little hand holding mine is part of what I miss most. Angel said to me a couple days before she passed on thank you mommy for taking care of me, I Love You!  This is what I mean about how precious she was in so many ways.  God knows my baby will be and is missed each and every day.  I'm thankful God gave her to me and am comforted knowing that he holds her safe beside him in heaven.    


 

 

 

11/24/2011
Click here to see Misty Trantham's
Family Tree
Tributes and Condolences
that time of year   / Kristi Worthen (best friend )
hey babygirl   im sitting here listing to all of our old songs that we used to love and rock out to =]     && remembering all the times we had around this time of the year. ridding to little rock with tyler his gran...  Continue >>
who'd you be today---kenny chesney   / Kristi Worthen (sisters)
Sunny days seem to hurt the most, i wear the pain like a heavy coat, I feel you eveywhere i go, i see your smile, I see your face, I hear you laughing in the rain, still can't believe your gone. it aint fair you died too young, like a story that had...  Continue >>
Click here to pay tribute or offer your condolences
Her legacy
Things that I never got to share!  
Angel one day I was going to share your life’s story and how you came to be but never go that chance. I wanted a child more than anything in this world for years I prayed for you. The doctors said no children in my future but I didn’t give up or lose faith I continued to pray. Especially during the earliest part of your existence from within the womb somehow I was affected with morning sickness this prompted me to pray even more. The reason why is because I knew no way was it possible I was pregnant in the physical sense yet heavenly father had a plan. You were brought into the world through a different woman whom told me later she had always had morning sickness till you. This woman did not wish to have another child and even confessed she tried to abort you while you were early in the womb. I was in a different State when heavenly father prompted me to return to my previous State and home. There was a catch to this prompting though I did not want to return to my previous home. I could not ignore my heavenly father, obey is what I had to do but in doing so I asked for you once more. Shortly after obeying heavenly father and returning to my previous home. My sister came to tell me of a woman the one who carried you but she was not certain if I was interested. Later my sister brought this woman my home immediately there was no explaining it but she knew I was your Mother. The same happened to me I knew she was the one whom held my most cherished gift you. I took her to the doctor visits and did not miss a moment in anxious anticipation of the moment you would come. I even knew the day and the moment you would come into the world my sweet precious child. The happiest day of my life was when I first looked into your eyes it was as if I had looked into the soul of heaven. The moment our eyes met their was no description that comes close the world stopped and peace joy and love filed every inch of space in the room. Your eyes held keys that can never be replaced unconditional love was what you brought into my life. Holding you in my arms my life was complete nothing could ever come close to expression of contentment holding you brought to my world. As I watched you grow you were intelligent, walked, talked and latched onto every moment of life with an indescribable energy and enthusiasm. Other attributes arose along the way you were inquisitive, loyal, loving and kind. I watched you on numerous occasions as you dance through my world with so much joy and ambition to live for the moment. Reminding me continuously to smell the flowers as you go, barney the dinosaur songs were sung regularly. We shared laughter, joy, fun, sunshine, rainbows, stars and lent the world such a great gift with your incredible smile. You touched others hearts & souls making a difference everywhere you went. You had an incredible sense of humor bringing laughter everywhere. There were toys consisting of barney, baby bop, baby dolls, jacks, monopoly, the list goes on and on. Our journey had mostly laughter although we did have some tears. It was a tough world for both of us at times the man calling himself dad made days harder than they had to be. I wish so many times sweet girl I would have gathered you up and just stowed away with you far far away. I remember so much holding you in my arms protecting you from all sorts of possible harms. You have no ideal my sweet girl just how much you meant to me for this I’m sorry I never truly let you know. I needed you darling with every ounce of my soul you thought me so much without you I’m lost. I just don’t know how to go on sweetheart my heart is broken and this time I don’t think it can be fixed. I try so hard to go forward but again without you I’m so lost while you were here I had purpose. You made me so happy through you I lived each day, sure we had moments where we did not see eye to eye. But my precious you have no ideal how I lived each breath through you how you gave me energy I never knew. How I could look in your eyes and see far into your soul our souls are forever connected in ways unexplainable. I wanted to be beside you one day when you heard your own babies cry, as you went through the college years, watch you walk down the isle and see all the things for you I never had. Darling I wanted to be your mommy I needed to be your mommy how do I go forward without you here. I don’t understand why this had to happen I’m lost in so many ways my life can never move forward as happy as before you left me. I know you thought somehow you were not important in my world now you’ll never know just how much I depended on you. I wish so many things could have come to be.



You loved everyone in your path, shared everything you had, giving each day completely from the heart.
Never did you meet a stranger, Felt it was your duty and worried if someone was ill, sad or needed of something you had. So funny you could be especially for family and friends, I’ve so much to share for you were so busy with life an expert spelling bee champ, wonderful swimmer, award winning merit list holder, expert baby sitter, gymnast, signer, flute player in the band. You were going to be a pediatrician, have beautiful children of your own one girl and one boy. You were such a beautiful gift teaching me and others along your way. You were known for fighting for the underdog, and had such an exceptional spirit and love of all living things. You loved sweet movies, music, talking on the phone with friends, constantly on the go. Apple Jacks for breakfast, pickles, ice cream, candy, cheeses’ food the list goes on and on. You had courage, compassion and love more than some people will ever know.

As the years went by and I watched you grow I remember so many things your driving the four wheeler and flipping it. Getting up seeing my face full of fear and running your way you said I’m okay mom I was so scared I said no more four wheeler for you. Angel do you know somehow how much you meant to me how very much I love you? Please somehow let me know, life is so hard with you gone I just want to hold you once more that’s all I ask God please let me hold you close just once more. I remember holding you close in my arms looking into your eyes sharing a connection only the two of us could know. A friend of yours told me of days when you and her would roll down the hill to see who could make it to the bottom first. How you lived so much in such a short time it’s as if somehow you always knew your days were short. I could not count the cards and notes you wrote the pictures you drew for me how much you loved me. When you hugged me my darling nothing of this world could ever matter I wanted so much to repay your sweet love. Sometimes I would over hear you talking for hours on the phone and just giggle to myself as if I were living as a child through you. So many times it crossed my mind how I would remind you of some of those day’s. I know you would not want me to cry no matter how hard it is for me not to I’ll try not to anymore. It’s been almost two years now since you left my side to return to heaven and seems it will always be hard. If tomorrow things were different and I had a chose to make to suffer in pain or to never know you there is not doubt what the answer would be. No matter how much pain I’ve endured or how much may come because I can no longer hold you in my arms. I would trade one precious moment of you in my life not one I assure you.
My heart continues it's longing for you!  

I spend each day wishing you were close my heart continues to long for you.  Can't help but wonder how I will continue on sweet girl without you.
No one will ever love me the way you did Angel, look over my short commings and just accept me.  You were going to be my college girl it would not be long till you would be 17.  One day when I needed someone to take care of me when no longer I could do that you would have I could count on that.  Now what do I do whom will love me enough to look after me in my final day's?  It's not fair that you had to leave me so soon you were the best part of my world.  I go to your final resting place almost every day just to feel closer to you.  Knowing your not there yet not knowing how to go forward without you still.  Some day's it's as if your still with me I ask Heavenly Father to hold you close, hug and kiss you daily.  My strenght is really weakness if only others knew just how much you built my world and made it all worth while.  My heart hurts and all I can hope is you watch over and guide me from heaven.  If only just once more I could look in those eyes, see that sweet smile and hold your precious hand.  Never again would I ask heavenly father for anything more.  I Love you and miss you sweetie!  Love Mommy    

December 1st light a candle to say Happy Birthday Angel!  

Happy Sweet Sixteen day my sweet Angel!  I'll never forget the party plans we spoke about just weeks before your jorney from this world.  Remember asking about inviting lots of people for the biggest party ever my sweet girl?  I'm asking Heavenly Father to take over for me since I can't be up there with you.  I promise this day will be celebrated in many way's but especially from deep inside my heart.  Regardless of the fact that I can not see you blow out the candles on the biggest cake ever, the day will still be a celebration in your honor.  I never forget your 5 year old birthday when you thought we were not going to celebrate because we had taken in Kristol and Jessica.  The tears that came to your eyes when I walked in with that birthday cake and we sang happy birthday.  You are so precious, so loving and so cherrished.  Today I will be thinking of Heavenly Father lighting the candles on that beautiful cake and just think of all the people in attendance.  I wish I could be there but apprantly there is still work for me here.  But my sweet precious Angel my spirit will be with you throughout this day.  HAPPY BIRTHDAY listen for me to wake up singing the happy birthday song just for you.  I know Heavenly Father will let you hear me singing just for you on this special Birthday.  I Love You!  

The first moment her eyes met mine!  
Angel was sent to me by God even though I did not give birth to her she was prayed for long before she came into the world. With Angel the only thought I had about adoption was missing all the events leading up to her birth. Where you go to the doctor or watching the baby grow inside through ultrasound but God loved me so much. He fixed it so that I would not miss a thing down to the morning sickness through the wonderful experience of open adoption I didn’t miss a thing. The day she was born I had told everyone before hand she would be born on that day long before it came. Then secretly not wanting to intrude on the Bio Mothers first moment I did not ask to hold her first but God knew my hearts secret. This goes to show he knows the desires of our heart because he knew mine and I did not even ask him for the moment to hold her first. When she was born her screams were loud enough I know the whole hospital could have heard her of course my heart was swelling from wanting to cradle her but not dare asking. At that moment it was like God told the doctor to ask if I wanted to hold her quickly I looked over at the Bio Mother asking if it were okay. She started before I could ask go ahead hold her she said taking my sweet Angel in my arms she looked into my eyes and the room went quite. When her eyes met mine I knew she was my Angel and she knew I was her Mommy. I am so thankful she allowed me to be her mommy and that God blessed me with this most precious gift of love.
 
Misty's Photo Album
Angel how beutiful she could be!
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